


a cage of bones, nothing inside

by communistuncle



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Akira is kinda sad, Eating Disorders, He's a bit of an unreliable narrator in reference to his friends because depression y'know, Kind of negative towards the other phantom thieves but just because akira is kinda sad, me? projecting onto Akira? a bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:13:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28074504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/communistuncle/pseuds/communistuncle
Summary: Akira thinks on his relationships with his friends, and goes on a cafe date with his rival.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Kurusu Akira, Kinda - Relationship
Kudos: 69





	a cage of bones, nothing inside

**Author's Note:**

> I did not proofread this nor have I thought about anything I've said in the slightest. I will never change, I will never improve, I am simply bored and wish to project feelings onto my boy Akira. Trigger warning for eating disorders.

People often seemed to forget that at a base level Akira Kurusu was just a kid. Sure, he was the leader of an infamous crime group, had ties to a shady doctor and ex-yakuza member, but he was also just 16 years old and was thrown into the deep end of an awful lot of bullshit. Whenever he had time to sit down and think it became apparent that even his own friends didn't understand just how much pressure they put on him. And in the end, were they even really his friends? Of course he was theirs, he always offered advice and a shoulder to cry on when they needed it, but when he really sat down and thought it became apparent that while he knew so much about so many people, none of them really knew anything about him. On one hand he felt that was a good thing, to never submit to the mortifying idea of being known, but on another hand it felt terribly lonely to be a friend to so many people but not feel like he was anything more than an insignificant and replaceable piece of their own lives. He loved them all terribly, but he felt that deep down they could never love or understand him themselves. He was an empty shell of a person that switched personas with every interaction he had. As long as he said the right things, acted the right way, he could surround himself with friends without ever letting himself be known.

Perhaps this is why he liked hanging around Akechi so often, the other many was clearly putting on a show for the world. He didn't know Akechi, he knew the detective prince who charmed everyone he came into contact with. He feels that Akechi understands the deep yearning for love and acceptance that Akira feels, that they both just want others to like them without having to expose anything about themselves. If no one knows who he is then he cannot be rejected for who he is, and if he supports his friends unconditionally then they will stick by him so long as he doesn't fuck it up. From what Akira can tell, Akechi doesn't have any friends, but is pleasing his fans any different from Akira pleasing his friends? At the end of the day they are more similar than one would think at first glance.

The pressure only got worse when they learned of Akechi's plans, Akira couldn't explain it but he felt a powerful connection between himself and the detective. Not only did he have to face Akechi's betrayal, but his friends came up with a plan that put his life on the line. He knew that this was the best option for everyone involved, however the carelessness with which they treated his very life felt worse than any wound a shadow may have inflicted. He was cursed to constantly sacrifice his own well-being, his time and effort, his very soul for the sake of the Phantom Thieves. His childish crush on one Goro Akechi, and his qualms with being caught and interrogated by police weren't all that important in the grand scheme of things. Even if he was to die in the cold interrogation room, alone with his rival or friend or crush or whatever category he would eventually choose to place Akechi, even then it wouldn't matter much to the outside world. He was inconsequential to everyone else, and oftentimes he wasn't even sure he was really alive in the first place. So what's the big deal with dying, when in the end he has never felt like a person to begin with.

He sits alone with Akechi in a nearly empty cafe, not Le Blanc, but one of the places Akechi chose to review on his food blog and invited Akira along. While Akira knew this was just a ploy to convince him of the other boy's friendship, he couldn't help but enjoy the excitement of his company being wanted by the other.

"What can I get for you boys?" The waitress asks in a dulcet tone, pulling Akira from his thoughts.

"I'll have an order of the Nutella crepes, and a vanilla latte." Akechi replies with the same fake TV smile he used while he was manipulating Akira and his friends, the look appearing far more sinister now that Akira is aware of Akechi's far from innocent lifestyle.

"Black coffee please, I'm not very hungry." Akira tells the waitress who writes down the order before retreating back behind the counter.

"Come to think of it Kurusu-kun, I've never seen you eat anything outside of the metaverse. Please tell me our fearless leader isn't neglecting his health, we need you to be at your best after all."

"You say that is if I haven't noticed one of our strongest members excusing himself to the bathroom after every single one of our shared meals." Akira says, keeping up his indifferent expression

"Ah yes well, I suppose it's easier to notice the poor eating habits of another when you share a similar vice," Akechi replies "though aren't you worried that your friends will notice?"

"Aren't you worried your fans will notice?"

"The public will see what they want to see, no one wants to think that the detective prince could be engaging in such a behavior"

"Maybe our teammates are the same, can't stand to think of their leader as being afraid to eat."

"My fans don't share the same proximity to me as your friends to you, nor the responsibility of friendship that you all share."

"You may be right, but in the end it's easier for them to ignore it than to face the ordeal of accepting and correcting it," Akira says before continuing "I'll cut you a deal, if you're interested."

"Oh? And what might that be?"

"If you keep down your crepes then I'll order a sandwich, eat at least half."

"And what makes you think that I'll accept such an offer?" Akechi asks

"The responsibility of friendship, as you called it."

"Are we friends? I blackmailed my way onto your team, and ordered that you disband after our infiltration is complete."

"We hung out before that though, I believe that means something."

"And how will you know that I didn't purge the second I got home?"

"You can come by my place and watch Featherman with me after, I haven't watched the last few episodes with everything going on, and we'll get some bonding time along with me being able to keep an eye on you."

"Well while the idea of surveillance isn't exactly appealing, I also have missed a few episodes and your company isn't entirely appalling."

"Does that mean we have a deal?"

"I suppose it does."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it and please give constructive criticism and if you think I need to add any warnings please let me know.


End file.
